Parent Teacher Conferences
by Mouserocks-nerd
Summary: When Clark and Lois go to meet with Jason's teacher, the last thing Clark expects is for him to be on the spot. Humorous one shot.


**A/N:** Hello! Random ideas for one shots have been popping into my head of late while I'm trying to work out the kinks of another story- and since I want to finish that one before investing myself into anything else long-term, I figured I would just give you this humorous short! Enjoy and review please!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything. . . yada yada yada. . . and Superman saves the day.

Parent Teacher Conferences

"Mr. and Mrs. Kent! So good to see you both were able to make it. I understand you're both very busy with your work." Jason's teacher smiled sweetly. She had strawberry blonde hair, and appeared about in her late twenties-early thirties, but seemed sort of bookish and nerdy- though very pretty. Lois couldn't help thinking that this girl would be a great match for Jimmy.

"Always a pleasure," Clark reached out and shook the woman's hand. Lois bit back a retort and settled for just a smile. Clark glanced at the chalkboard behind her to check on the name- Ms. Sneedly.

"Please, take a seat," she gestured.

Lois complied. Clark took one look at the flimsy little desk and attached chair and knew that wasn't going to fly. He was six foot four, over two hundred pounds, and to top it all off, could snap it apart with his pinky finger if he so pleased. Which he didn't.

So instead he opted to lean on the desk itself, floating against it a bit to support his weight more, feet firmly planted on the ground. Lois gave him a look, but said nothing. The teacher rose her eyebrow. "You don't want to sit, Mr. Kent? We have time."

"Oh, no, I'm fine." He brushed off her comment with a smile.

She appeared a little unsettled. "Alright then. Uh, so. Jason. Well, what can I say about him? He's a remarkable young boy."

Lois smiled at Clark. "Yes, we know."

"He's getting excellent grades- here's his report card if you'd like to look. Even his gym grade is going up- I know from his grades from last year he was struggling a little with that. He's made miraculous progress there."

"Straight A's," Clark remarked quietly as he glanced it over.

"Needs improvment?" Lois asked incredulously. "What is that comment supposed to mean? He has perfect grades- even in gym! What on earth could he need improvment with?"

"Lois," Clark breathed and gave her a warning look. She glared back at him and he sighed, knowing he had already lost. _Of course, Lois, being the glass half- empty type of person, hones in on the one negative comment,_ Clark thought to himself.

"Now, Mrs. Kent, I was going to get to that in a minute. As I said previously, Jason is a wonderful child. He's an intelligent, well-behaved and mature little boy."

"But," Clark began. He winced and cocked his head, listening briefly to the sound of sirens in the distance before determining that the police had it under control. He tuned back into their current conversation.

". . . and again he's an outstanding student, but it's just something I think you guys should look into. It's not like he really needs to hear every single direction or something- he's a bright enough boy to figure things out on his own, and he's way ahead of the class."

"Then what's the problem?" Clark asked, having missed the first bit of the conversation.

Ms. Sneedly looked at him strangely. "He's having trouble keeping his attention on the curriculum. He's very easily distracted. Now, like I said, it's not really a problem now, but it could create problems in the future if you don't keep an eye on it."

"I'm sorry, but I just don't see the big issue with it. If he's not causing problems in the classroom, then why bring it up?" Lois was frowning now. _Here it comes_, Clark thought.

"Well, I mean he can be a bit rambunctious-"

"A healthy curiosity," Lois interrupted.

"And he draws or doodles frequently during lessons-"

"So he's artistic. That's a plus," Lois continued to intervene.

Ms. Sneedly folded her hands on her desk and tried to give Lois a condescending look, but it looked more of discomforture than condescension. "Mrs. Kent, I think you're missing the point here."

"What? Go ahead and say it. You think my son has some sort of disorder- what, ADD or something? My son is completely normal for a boy his age."

Clark glanced at Lois, one eyebrow slowly inching its way upward. _Normal?_ Lois sighed. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get short with you. It's just. . . you have to understand that we've been through a lot recently."

Ms. Sneedly smiled consolingly. "I do read the papers, Mrs. Kent. Both you and your husband's writing, as a matter of fact. And I'm aware of the issues that happened last year with Lex Luthor. . ."

Clark tuned out once again as he heard a clattering noise in the hallway. He turned and looked through the walls to determine the source of the noise- which only turned out to be another parent who had dropped his cell phone. He turned back to the conversation.

"I see this a lot in intelligent children. Usually it's just a biproduct of overstimulation and an intense curiosity- which isn't necessarily a bad thing. I mean, when it comes to your guys' profession, curiosity and a little bit of impulsiveness is not only expected, but required. It could be just the environment he's used to, always running off to chase a story, a lead, or whatnot- I can't profess to know all that goes on in a newsroom."

"Well, like you said though, Ms. Sneedly- that's our jobs. We need to be that way in order to make a living. If Jason's inheritted any sort of curiosity or passion for what his parents do, I don't see what the harm in that is. I mean, maybe he's just emulating us because he wants to be a reporter."

"Mrs. Kent, I don't care if he wants to grow up and be Superman, it's going to cause problems in the now-"

This time it was a cry for help. Clark fidgetted with his glasses, then with his tie. It was a mugging. He glanced out the window nervously, listening in a moment. He should have been out there, helping. _Stay calm, Clark. You know very well that even you can't save everyone. Maybe this will rap up soon and you can go help. Or maybe you can go sneak off for a bit. . ._

"I just think he should be taken in to see a child psychologist. What's the harm in that?"

"What if his friends find out that he's going to therapy? Don't you think that would do some harm?" Lois was trying her best to be polite now, but Clark could see it was taxing her patience.

"Believe me, Mrs. Kent, a lot of students go to see therapists or psychologists nowadays. It's not as much of a stigma now as it used to be."

"He's only seven! He'll grow out of it!"

Ms. Sneedly glanced at Clark, looking him up and down with an appearance of discomfort. "You don't know that."

Lois looked indignant. It finally seemed to strike Clark what it was the teacher had just implied as he tuned back into the conversation at hand. "Wait, what?"

"Are you suggesting something, Ms. Sneedly?" Lois asked, indignant.

She looked at Lois and Clark with a mixture of pity and distaste. She tried her best to phrase things politely from here on out. "I'm not saying anything of the sort. I'm just saying- I mean, Jason will look away at random, act like he's listening to other things completely, zone out and stare out the window daydreaming- he's just all around flighty. Sometimes they grow out of it, and sometimes. . . well, sometimes it's genetic."

Lois's jaw had dropped in shock. Clark rarely allowed himself to get upset with anyone- usually Lois had that covered for him- but he couldn't help but be offended this time. "I'm sorry, are you saying that you think _I'm _the reason why Jason's having difficulties focusing?"

"Well, not in so many words. . ."

"Yes. Yes in so many words. In fact, you practically said that outright."

The girl looked uncomfortable. "Apples don't fall that far from the tree, Mr. Kent."

Clark reddened slightly. How dare she suggest that his son was anything less than perfect- because of _his _problems! Just because he's advanced- probably because he was hearing things in the distance like his father was.

And this was only the end of the first quarter of the second grade! If they kept this up, it was sure to be a long year.

Clark took three deep breaths, not disturbing anything in the room with his release, and finally spoke. "Well, like you said. It's most likely his intelligence combined with overstimulation. There's no reason to have any tests done."

Ms. Sneedly gave him a look that said otherwise. "Now, Mr. Kent, there's no need to get defensive here. But, out of curiosity, I would like to know if there's any histories of attention deficit disorders in yours or Lois's families."

Clark squared his jaw. "I wouldn't know. I was adopted. And as far as it goes with myself, I don't have any disorders, either. Believe me, I've been tested for a lot of things. When I was a kid especially, and no one's ever told me before that there was something wrong with me. Not to my face." He smiled at her tightly, a smile that dared her to retort.

She seemed incredibly uncomfortable now and straightened the papers on her desk to avoid his steely blue gaze. "I'm sorry, Mr. Kent. I did not mean to offend. I was just trying to be helpful, looking out for Jason's best interests."

"Well, I can appreciate that, Ms. Sneedly, but Jason's doing just fine and-" Suddenly Clark broke off and snapped his attention to the window. His features paled as he heard the reports of the bank robbery going on over the police scanners and the cries from the people within the scene of the crime. It wouldn't be a big step until it evolved into a worse situation.

"Mr. Kent? Mr. Kent," Jason's teacher waved her hand towards him. Clark slowly turned back to face both her and Lois. "See, that's what I'm talking about. Where did you go just now?"

Clark locked eyes with Lois, a look of worry and apology in them. Lois knew immediately and shook her head firmly once.

"Lois," he began.

"No. Don't you dare," she whispered.

Clark looked pained. "I have to."

"No."

"I'm sorry, am I missing something here? What's going on?" Ms. Sneedly asked, perplexed. She glanced between the couple carefully.

Lois spoke at the same time as Clark did.

"Nothing. He's not gonna weasel his way out of this one."

"Yes, do you have a bathroom I can use nearby?"

The teacher blinked. "I'm sorry?"

"Bathroom?" Clark repeated with a firm tone before Lois could open her mouth again.

"Um, down the hall and to the left." Clark dashed out of the room, leaving Lois to deal with the rest of the conversation.

Lois spoke under her breath so that no one could hear her except for Clark. "Clark, this had better be life or death. Otherwise you're dead meat when I get home."

"You see, this is exactly the type of behavior that Jason's exhibiting. It's like another force entirely drives him," the teacher continued. Lois sighed while she was forced to pay extremely close attention to the teacher's ramblings.

Clark came back just in time to say his goodbyes. "Oh, and Mr. Kent?"

Clark turned around to face her with a taut smile. "Yes, Ms. Sneedly?"

"Here," she pressed a sticky note into his hand. "I know you don't want to, but I think it might be what's best for you and your son. Just something to keep in mind. Maybe you should call and set up an appointment."

He glanced down at the note to find a phone number written down labeled with the name of a family phsychiatrist. He gave her an obviously forced smile. "I'll keep that in mind," he spoke snidely. He felt Lois's stare burning a hole through his head and toned it back. "Thanks for all your help and time," Clark added, glancing back at his wife for approval.

She nodded and smiled to the young woman. "Yes, it was so nice to see you again." Lois both sounded and appeared to be genuine, but there was a sticky sweet venom to her tone that Clark knew meant bad news. He was quick to shuffle her out of the room with as much politeness as possible.

They stepped out into the hallway, and another set of parents walked in. Clark breathed a sigh of relief. By the tense of her shoulders, however, Clark could tell Lois was just winding up.

"That self-righteous, nosy, know-it-all bi-"

"Lois, honey, um I think we'd better save that conversation for the car," Clark stepped in quickly. Lois frowned petulantly but agreed upon seeing some of the looks other parents were giving her up and down the hallway.

Clark wrapped his arm around her. "Aw, come on. It could have gone worse."

"How?"

"She could have recommended he get glasses."

And with that Lois laughed.

*****S*****


End file.
